thirteen

Got woken up by the sweeties gift from some-one i adore so much :)
no matter what i always call you my perfect hug till the end .

"somehow, you just make me smile for no reason and i like the feeling when I'm around you..your hugs are the perfect one,your hugs has this feeling that i love, where i can be somewhere, no-one can be, all i can do is just think about you when your not around me.." - Stacee Pablo.

A day where things happen for a reason.

As much it hurts me to write this but i said the words "It Over"
:'(

Ice-cream Baby.

Today was an alright day, it went pretty fast though. Work was the usually but busy, it was good cause i didn't take notice the time till work wasn't busy. And after got home before 5pm, rested for abit till i went for an hour walk with immaree, after that rest for abit. And then my lover come over and we walk for another hour :) I love walking aye aye..
Anyway got home, ate dinner with family and my lover. It kinda got funny at the end cause we quietly clean up the table so my grandma wouldn't do the dishes, but she caught us hahahah! i love my lola heaps (L)
Then after that, i keep asking earl "buy me ice-cream bubby", I'm craving for ice-cream" LOL! So i went to buy ice-cream with earl at the 7-11 near my house, bought 4 ice-cream :D and i was happy hahha!

the end.

Best.

I'm know you speechless at the moment on what i wrote to you, but that's how i really feel now. As much it hurts me to say to you. It just i don't want to say it in person, as you know me already i don't take goodbyes very well :'(. I don't want to really let us go like that. Cause it will hurt me just seeing you go. After what we both been through! I mean we've been through so much.
When i got your text during work, it hit me! how much you are willing to let our friendship go after what i wrote to you about how i feel towards our friendship :'( I never knew that you could get speechless over my blog. After how long we haven't talk to each other. And had no time to bond as best friends, you as you can see we tend to be busy when we plan something. Like i was so thankful that you ARE my best friend, when i was so helpless and i couldn't handle with the pressure at home. Cause you were there to comfort me in my downs moments and i love how you are always there for me, not matter what.
I 've told you so many things that i wouldn't tell anyone about, and you the only one person who i would turn to, with everything i do. You the one who i would tell whats new with me or whatever that comes around the corner.
You know me too well better then anyone else that knows me longer then you. And those friendship i'vebeen through they never last. But our friendship, i wouldn't trade it for any other friendship.

(8) One month, four days and three hours since the time
that you left me sitting here wondering why.
Now I guess that some things happen for a reason but I can’t see how this has a brighter side.
God knows I’ve been let down before, but nothing like this, oh no.
Seems like all I have in store is pain, cause…

When nothing helps you to get through the night,
When you can’t eat, ain’t got no apetite,
When your friends try to come around, but even they can’t make you smile.
These are the signs (these are the signs),
these are the signs (these are the signs),
these are the signs of a broken heart (8)

I wish it wasn't like this, but it how i really feel. I REALLY want to fix it but we both waited too long and i don't know how i will cope if it keeps going on like this. And we treat eachother the same the same, and it ends just like that. I do hope we do not end it just like that ><" AND KEEP OUR STRONG FRIENDSHIP! And keep going.

:'(

Dear.

Best, i know i haven't done much to our friendship lately and you notice it. But for the truth it doesn't feel the same now a days. We both try have our best bonding time, but it never happen cause we both busy with our day to day bases. And have other important things to do. And have other people to worry about nor talk about everything/ problems. I'm sorry if i haven't done much of being the best friend i should be. But for the past few weeks/months that has past. It doesn't feel the same no-more. Like i can't tell you my problems nor talk to you for whole day. Cause I'm not use to it! us not talking like how many hours...
We both have someone else to talk to about our problems and that. It hurts me see you talk to someone about everything and when i ask how you are and that when it comes to a problem. You say "nah it okay i spoke to someone about it". It like you don't want to tell me whats wrong no-more. I get hurt! As much it hurts me to say but "WE both need space and if it doesn't feel right... it time to let go and move on i say" Cause i can't stand me waiting and see what happen to our friendship. And i don't want to wait and let it fall... You probably feel the same too. But it so hard to let you go as you can see...and as my only best friend i consider thean other people i've know longer.
I'm sorry but it just doesn't feel the same no-more for me :( I'm starting to feel left out. But it up to you how you feel. I'm here for you if you need anyone to talk to and that.
But I'm letting you know how i feel about our friendship. I really do miss the old times, i really do! , it just i don't think it will happen if we keep going on like this. And you know it. Now you going away soon to think and that.. i hope whatever you make when you get back, makes your life more easier to cope and happier.
BUT I'm always here for you.

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."— G. Randolf

Wishlist.

mad photo this is, surfing the net and i come by to this photo, which caught my attention to it. The colour of the back ground, and how it so simple and catching photo.

- Canon Digital SLR camera range to 50D- 1000D
- Fish eye Lens
- External Unit flash for Olympus or Canon
- Lomography Camera
- New canon SLR film camera.
- Laptop

PASSION!

What a Easter weekend , Passion concert was on today, and it was so good! (Y) Here are some pictures from that night. Currently I'm adoring Nessa Rica song "hearts desire" that songs is so meaning-full. Visit this link from You Tube.
Nessa Rica and her band singing
http://tr.youtube.com/watch?v=X2YSr5FyvyI

Passion Singing "Well Done"
http://tr.youtube.com/watch?v=YdOEeOFXQGI

Favourite Photo of the Day.

Time for a Creative and Inspired

Currently listening to a mix CD from "Gossip" i got on my birthday weekend back in January. It a good remix! Anyway I'm a try my best and keep up to date with this blog. Can't be bother with my other one. But I TRY! to update it. LOL! i say it now but never end up doing it cause I'm hardly on the computer these days. But anyways time to comment about certain lifestyle I'm starting to like.

The use of the nerdy glasses and the style of the photography, totally loving it. It so old school style and the colour of the photos love it too! I want to own a variety of nerdy glasses so far have 2 pairs.

So lazy to write paragraph after another one. Point form style :P hahah!
- wanting a fish eye len for my Olympus camera E-410
- wanting a film camera
- wanting heaps of variety of bangles.
- saving up for an external flash for both digital and film camera
- trying to live the life of a photographer.
- party as much as i can before taking the next step
- get back to studies for photography and hopefully get into uni.
- SAVE MONEY
- need of a fringe cut
- re-dye my blonde
- find a better decent job for my liking.
- I WANNA GO OP SHOPPING!
- buy a new digital slr camera, either Nikon and Canon.
- my soon to be niece baby aurora is due soon
- baby shower soon for kaecee's
- in-need of winter clothing
- wanting and waiting to get a tattoo on my back saying me last name.

Time to Time.

Time to take my life serious. Like think about what i really want out from this. Basically i want to live the life of a photographer. But it will take time to get there. Now everything is coming to point where you have to give up on the things you loved to do to have better things in life or not. Right now things ain't okay, i haven't gone out much cause certain reason and it time to change my habits to make people happy. And my friendship toward other are drifting again. But it what want for a mean while till i have everything shorted out with my life. Anyways the new is I'm going back to working full time again at the fast food area. And save money for my tafe next year.